“If I’m not blowing something up or fixing what’s remaining, it doesn’t feel right.”
So, I’m currently going through a transformation challenge.
It’s a little bit different from what you’d think a transformation challenge looks like. This challenge has nothing to do with nutrition or what I look like in a bikini. It’s focused on personal development, to put it simply.
This week, I said the quote above to one of our coaches leading us through the challenge.
Because recently, I realized that I have only known life in chaos. Whether at the Naval Academy, in the Navy, or even as a gym owner, there have always been fires to put out, fires to avoid, or buildings to rebuild after the fire.
My life’s central tug-of-war, between breaking and rebuilding, always seemed romantic and even purposeful, but it has actually limited my life in countless ways.
This may also be the case for you.
Let me ask you a question.
Do you want your life to get better?
Do you hope for a day where you’re not doing exactly what it is you’re doing today?
Do you hope for more growth, more understanding, more satisfaction, and more peace in life?
Because if you want life to get better, you’re going to have to deal with something. And that’s called: a better life.
I want to warn you to be careful what you wish for, because…
In a better life, there aren’t as many fires to put out.
In a better life, there may be other people putting those fires out for you, or maybe, there is simply no oxygen for those fires to continue.
It could be a member cancellation notice, a coach not showing up for class, or a number of commons issues we face as gym owners. If you’ve figured out a way to transcend these issues, you’ve either hired someone to handle them for you, or you run a tight ship at work, where your policies and procedures prevent these issues from turning into bigger problems.
In a better life, it can be eerily uneventful.
We all talk about how great it would be to enjoy margaritas on the beaches of Puerto Vallarta, but by day two of our trip (if our resolve is even strong enough to get us to day two) most of us are antsy.
“What else is there to do?”
“Is there anything else to see but crystal blue waters of the ocean?”
“What’s happening at the gym?”
“I’m ready to go home.”
Yeah, unfortunately a lot of us suck at relaxation. There’s too much AMRAP in our blood to really be good at it.
Even when we’re not on vacation, we might find that we don’t have that much to do some days. Because now, as proper business owners, we’ve learned to workon the business, not in the business, just as we’ve been instructed…
The thing is, our addiction to the chaos is the biggest thing that prevents us from having a better life.
Because deep down, we’re scared of what it really means to have a better life.
We know that when things calm down and we don’t have anything to do with our hands, we’ll get bored. And we’ve been there.
We’ve been bored before and we don’t like bored.
Boredom is scary, isn’t it?
It causes us to binge eat.
It causes us to create busy work.
It causes us to derail good things in our lives.
Because when we get bored, we immediately look for the fires. We look for what else we can do/fix/break.
“What gym ownership podcast can I listen to? What business book can I read?”
We say, “I want to know more about running a business,” but what we really mean is, “Tell me what I’m doing wrong so I have things to fix and… fires to put out.”
“Distract me, please,” we tell life. And so, powerful beings that we are, we make those fires happen. We create the chaos that keeps us away from boredom and more importantly, from the moment.
From the tender and impermanent moments we share with our loved ones.
From the laughter of kids.
From the first cup of coffee on the porch on a crisp morning.
If you’re scratching your head, trying to figure out the last time you experienced one of these moments, there’s a reason why you can’t remember.
If you think I am waxing poetic, have certifiably lost my shit, and don’t know jack about how to run a gym, there’s also a reason why (and it has nothing to do with you being right).
One way or another, your life will turn out exactly the way you want it to.
If you want to continue to put out fires, you will.
If you want to enjoy a better life, you will.
Just know what it is you really want to have in life because: you will.
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